If you’d like to be a part, just shoot us an e-mail via the Contact Form and let us know!

© MInTheGap for Is This Modest?, 2012. | Permalink | 2 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, blog, kindness

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From the “dress code” of modesty to the way a modest women presents herself, and even modest talk, not one rock will remain unturned as we take a journey into discovering the roots of different standards of modesty.

© tawnynicole001 for Is This Modest?, 2010. | Permalink | 5 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, clothing, culture, dress code, modesty, religion, standards

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Modesty! Its rather important to us! But, have you ever sat back and examined your standards of modesty? How your standard was formed? Considered other views of modesty? The annual Modesty Challenge gives each of us a chance to re-think modesty and discuss our finding!

This Years Modesty Challenge Begins on April 19th 2010 & Ends April 23rd 2010. The theme this year is “A week in Modest Feminine Attire”.  And just to make it interesting, we’ll pick one participant from those who take the challenge to get a free skirt from New Creation Apparel!

The Rules

For this years challenge, lets put the debate of skirts or jeans behind us. Skirts/Dresses of appropriate length are certainly modest. They are certainly feminine. And They are most defiantly no longer the “norm” for girls and women.

During the challenge, you should wear only skirts, dresses, culottes, or split-skirts. Try to keep outfits as feminine and modest as possible. Continue with your normal routine. Especially participate in activities you “thought you couldn’t do in a skirt” such as gardening, cleaning, housework, childcare, outdoor activities etc.

Take lots of pictures of yourself doing your normal routines in feminine modest clothing. (If you are uncomfortable taking your picture, take pictures of your outfit.) Post these pictures along with any thought or comments on the challenge to your personal blog. Your post should include a link to the challenge. Add your post to the list of links (Comments) so we can all see how your challenge is going!

Already a “skirt gal”? Great! You are still welcome to participate in the challenge. You may wish to make the challenge a bit more challenging for yourself by adding a “bit more feminine challenge”. Possibly challenge yourself to also wear feminine hair styles! (Think Buns & Braids!) Or to Speak or write more feminine.

Below I am listing some questions you may wish to answer concerning this years challenge!

Enjoy! I wish everyone a great experience during this years challenge! I am so excited to hear everyone’s thoughts!

Week in Modesty Questions:

1. Prior to the challenge, What was your standard of modesty? How has it changed after the challenge?

2. Prior to the challenge, How did you feel about wearing skirts or dresses? Did you feel they would be limiting? How has this view changed Post-Challenge?

3. Prior to the challenge what was your self-image like? Did this change any after the challenge?

4. Did you notice any changes in you behavior during the challenge? Did you notice any change in the way others treated you while wearing skirts/dresses?

5. Did you find picking out an outfit or getting ready during the challenge to be inconvenient? Why or Why not?

6. Did you find your skirt/dress to be limiting or inconvenient in any situations?

7. Did you find your self to be comfortable in your skirt/dresses? As compared to jeans?

8. Will you continue to wear skirts/dresses? Why?

~Please Respect this Blog & It’s Readers~

Any Links Posted with inappropriate or immodest content will be deleted.

© tawnynicole001 for Is This Modest?, 2010. | Permalink | 11 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, Casual, challenge, clothing, dress, fashion, jeans, modest, modesty, pants, skirt

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  I was in a wedding recently, where all the bridesmaids were sent their dresses.  I loved my dress! It was a beautiful light blue, mid-calf length skirt, with a big bow that tied in back. It was definitely a dress I could wear again, for formal dinners and fancy occasions. The only problem was…it had a low neckline.  I tried it on and held back a bit of a gasp when I saw where exactly that “neckline” fell (it was no where near my neck….). However,  attached to the dress’ tag, was this nice little piece of fabric with a hemmed edge. I realized that it was a “modesty panel” which is a nice little piece of fabric that matches the dress, and you sew it in the neckline to “raise” it up a little bit.

  I probably could have gotten away with not using it. No one really would have been surprised, and since none of the other bridesmaids wore theirs I would have blended right in.

  As it was, I stood out rather like a sore thumb. However, there were several reasons I wore it.  First, I have a husband who is rather protective of me (in a very good way) and he doesn’t like me to wear revealing clothes in public.  Second, I knew several of the young men at the wedding and I didn’t want them to have any problems looking at me as anything more than their friend.  Third, I wanted to show that Christian girls can be different. I made a choice that I was going to be different and not show off what fell on the boarder of “private”.

  The other bridesmaids chose not to wear their modesty panels, and that is their choice! I’m good friends with a few of them, and know that they didn’t make the choice out of a deep desire to be scandalous or risque. This was something that God convicted me on, not them.  We are all built differently, and what is revealing on one person may not actually “show anything” on someone else.   Which leads me to a question for you all (that we’ve discussed before, but haven’t really come to any conclusions on):  Can something be immodest for one person, and not for another?

© Erin L. for Is This Modest?, 2009. | Permalink | 18 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, erin, modesty panel

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There are quite a few companies that sell clothing that is especially geared towards modest clothing, some of which we have reviewed on Is This Modest? (DownEast Basics, The Skirt Site, etc.). These are great companies to have access to, and to support with our money.

However, there can be reasons for not always or often shopping at modest clothing stores. Tight finances is probably one of the top reasons…modest clothing companies tend to be higher priced, since they are often small businesses. But even women who are called to dress modestly want some selection in their clothing! So that is where this article comes in. I am going to be pinpointing some of the more obvious modesty issues with modern clothing, and some ways that we can adapt it to work for us ladies who care what we display for the world!

Low-cut tops:

*Wear a high-necked camisole or tank-top

*Try one of the many “neckline fillers” that are on the market today

*Wear a sweater over the top and keep it buttoned all the way up

*Use it as a jacket/top over a dress

Short skirts:

*Wear it for your husband around the house (if you’re married, of course)

*Use it for a quilt

*If it’s not too short, you could wear it with pants or leggings if you like this look

*Add a ruffle or strip of hemmed fabric to the bottom of the skirt

*Add a knit waistband to the top of the skirt

Tight pants:

*If they are just tight through the upper leg, wear a dress or longer shirt over the top.

Sleeveless shirts:

*If you feel that your shirt needs a bit more in the “sleeve area”, there are undershirts you can find that are snug with sleeves, for layering purposes

*Wear a sweater or jacket over the top

*Layer with yonder above “low-cup top”

Long slits in skirts:

*Sew it up part way (or all the way, if you still have room to walk)

*Add an insert (using matching or coordinating fabric) in the slit, so there is fabric in it but you still have the room to walk.

*Shorten the skirt (but keep it modest…) Then you shouldn’t need the kick-pleat anyway

Short shirts

*Use a long tank or camisole

*Get or make a “half undershirt” (this pattern is for maternity, but it is the same principle)

*Wear it over a dress (I have a few of these shirts and I wear them over this nice knit black dress from a thrift store, and it looks so nice!)

Tight tops:

*Wear it just for your husband at home (see note above…lol)

*Wear a sweater over the top

*Give it to someone smaller than you

Gaping Button-Front Shirts/Necklines:

*But a bigger size and have it tailored to fit you without gaping

*Wear a camisole or a half-camisole

*Sew small snaps on the shirt placket in between the buttons, so that the gaps are closed.

Do you have tips and hints for “modest-fying” your clothes? I’d love to hear how you do it…

© Erin L. for Is This Modest?, 2009. | Permalink | 9 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, diy, erin, modesty-fying, money

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I sit here in my chair, at my computer, depressed. I’ve sinned against God. Yet again. I seem to be doing this on a regular basis, and I continually wonder what God sees in me. What have I done that makes God want me? Is it because I champion for female modesty, something that goes against every grain of a male’s hardwiring? I don’t know. Honestly. It confuses me, why He would want me. Foy. It’s bizarre as all get out, especially when I consider what I’ve done. It’s nothing “excessively atrocious” – I haven’t killed anyone, or anything like that. And many people my age have done much worse. But a sin is a sin, and I feel that this has hurt God. 

And I wonder why I’m writing about sin on a blog that’s about modesty. But we’re about more than modesty, right? Aren’t we? Like I said last week, isn’t modesty just a reflection of our love for Christ? If that’s true, keeping a modest heart is the same as keeping a pure heart – a heart cleansed from sin.

I feel like there is someone out there, someone who needs to hear this message as much as I do, even as I write it: I don’t know why, but God loves us. For some strange, unknown reason, He loves the filthy, vomit smelling rags that we truly are. Oh how He loves us – to degrees unimaginable. He loves us so much that he sent his kid to die for us. His son! Imagine sending your child to the slaughter just so that you could save a nest of cockroaches from getting exterminated. Now that’s a thought. 

He.

Loves.

Us. 

Think about that. Ponder It. Remember It.

Foy Lyndstrom

© Foy for Is This Modest?, 2009. | Permalink | 8 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, Foy, God, love, Male

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I’ve come to a sudden conclusion tonight: We seem to have the wrong focus on modesty. To use a biological metaphor - we seem be focusing more on the symptoms of modesty, and less on the source. We seem to have forgotten the real reason that we should be modest: that Christ be glorified through us. Everything we talk about here at Is This Modest -whether it be our mouths, our clothes, or our thoughts – It all boils down to how we reflect the image of Christ in our lives. Remember – we are not the light: We are the mirror, reflecting the Fire of God out into the dark; a city on a hill; a light when all others go out.

Foy Lyndström

© Foy for Is This Modest?, 2009. | Permalink | 15 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, city, fire, focus, Foy, Male, mirror, purpose

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I went to a very conservative Christian highschool, and each year we had an annual tradition (yes, that phrase is redundant; Sue me) – Beach day. At the end of each year, the entire school took a “field trip” to the beach, to do whatever we wanted. But, there was a dress code. We were told that we represented Christ, and we had to dress accordingly. This made perfect sense.

Every year, several days before the trip, we were all addressed on what bathing suits were acceptable. Males had virtually no restrictions – the only thing we couldn’t wear were Speedos. Regular swimming trunks were perfectly acceptable, and shirts were not required.

As for the girls, things were different. No stomach was allowed to be shown, so one-piece suits were recommended, but “tankini’s” – the variety that are technically two piece but do not show stomach (but you all knew that already, probably) – were also allowed. Because there were many students of many ages being spoken to, the word “cleavage” was not said, but it was an unspoken rule that there should be little to none.

Do I have anything against any of these rules? No – not at all. But I do find them unique. Why?

It all comes down to the fact that the majority of modesty is not objective, but subjective. What do I mean by this?

For review: My Mac’s dictionary defines ‘objective’ as “not influenced by personal feelings or opinions in considering and representing”. A great example of some objective thinking would be when an official decides if a homerun is a homerun: It’s not that debatable. Either it is or it isn’t. You can discuss it as much as you like, but it is what it is. There is no middle ground.

Something subjective, however, is “based on or influenced by personal feelings, tastes, or opinions”. For instance, the judging of figure skating is extremely subjective. One official may watch a routine, and determine it to be a 7.3, while another may see it as 8.6.

So what is subjective and objective in modesty?

Well, there are some very basic body parts that we all, as a society, have deemed inappropriate to show. I don’t need to spell them out for you, you already know them. This is the “objective” realm of modesty. But, there are some regions of the body that are open to discussion for many people. Some think it is OK for women to show their entire stomachs and entire backs. Others do not. This is very subjective.

My thinking brought four different thoughts together: Objective Modesty, Subjective Modesty , the World’s views of what is subjective and objective in modesty, and what my School’s thoughts were on modesty. They all came together, and formed one large question in my mind.

Please, before I ask the following question, understand this: I’m not disagreeing with what we see as basic modesty. I agree 100% with the decisions my school gave. I am purely asking the following question to inspire thought and discussion:

Why is it modest for guys to show off their entire bare chest, but not modest for women to do the same? Is it because women have more “assets” in that area? Or is it because of the male mind? Or both? Or is it something else?

Why?

Foy Lyndström

© Foy for Is This Modest?, 2009. | Permalink | 16 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, Foy, male mind, modesty, objective, subjective, Swimsuit

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Many males have spent hours on end, attempting to figure out how the female mind works. Since 98% of this blog’s readers are female, it seems kind of pointless to discuss something you all know quite well.

However, there seems to be a lot of misunderstanding regarding the male mind. I’ll be upfront – I don’t really know it much myself, even though I’m a guy. Each day I learn something more about who I am, and how my mind works.

I’ll also be frank about something else: I’m going to be a bit blunt in this post, and I apologize for that if it is somewhat offensive to any of you. I could dance around with euphemisms, but they seem to usually get in the way.

I highly recommend that before you read this post, you read my previous post on this issue,  (the infamous “Gollum” post), if you have not read it already. It can be found here.

When it comes to modesty and the male mind, things get really weird. Our minds, in a way, are like robots. We are programmed. If you boiled it all down, it would read like this:

The basic, sinful desire of most every male is to see unclothed females.

It’s extremely embarrassing, it’s ugly, it’s sinful, and it’s the truth. We can try to deny it forever, but this lustful, sinful desire is hard-coded in our sinful beings.

Our beliefs about modesty are based on this concept, and in turn creates a second, equally ugly and sinful, but truthful, statement:

The easier it is for a male to mentally undress a female the more immodestly dressed she is.

This is not necessarily based on the amount of skin we can see at the moment. An example:

Two women are standing beside each other. One is dressed for extreme winter weather: humungous parka on, bulging out around her, a large windscreen is up on her face, and it is obvious that she has many layers around her legs as well. The second woman has her hands lifted in the air, draping merely a sheet over her entire body.

Which of these women is dressed immodestly? Neither is revealing skin at all, and yet the choice is obvious. Not only is a sole sheet closer to nudity than the parka, but it also suggests a physical encounter.

So yes, we’re a sinful bunch. Our minds are crap. But we’re not going down without a fight. As I mentioned in my Gollum post, we’re constantly engaged in warfare with the enemy. Every moment of every day is a constant fight to resist the temptations thrown at us by the world. Even as I type this, I’m tempted to look. It creates such frustration, for we yearn to please our Lord, and reject the sin around us, and yet the pleasure overwhelms us, and swarms through every part of our body.

Being a Christian single guy is like being a diabetic kid in a candy store whose head is covered by a blindfold. You can’t see the candy, you can’t touch the candy, and you can’t eat the candy. Yet you hear other kids oohing and ahhing, tasting the candy and enjoying every bit of it. Even if you know you can’t eat it, you still want to look at it, to see what all the fuss is about. And once you catch a glimpse of it, you want to keep on looking, and goodness gracious, you want to eat a whole bunch of it. You fight against your parents with everything you’ve got, trying to get that blindfold off for just a glimpse. Yet your parents keep it on there, knowing that it is for the best.

It’s a frustrating war we fight.

It’s an ugly war we fight.

And it’s the sad truth.

Foy Lyndström

© Foy for Is This Modest?, 2009. | Permalink | 7 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, Foy, The Male Mind

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———

Are their any tasks these days that one can do without being bombarded by immodesty?

Foy Lyndström

© Foy for Is This Modest?, 2009. | Permalink | 16 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, Foy, groceries, immodesty, Male, Shopping

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I on the other hand, was (and still am) quite unique. I grew up in a very conservative family and school environment, and even in my senior year of high school, was still “discovering” some of these connotations. Example: In English class, we got off on a tangent, and began discussing Quazzimoto’s romantic life (don’t ask). Now, when one discusses a hunchback, I always assumed that a correct synonym for a “hunch” – the item which makes a hunchback a hunchback – would be a “hump” [Peter Sellers innocently thought so in the Pink Panther movies, which I saw when I was young]. I then said something to the effect of: “someone would have to love humps to love him”. The class then began to wet their pants in laughter as I sat in utter confusion; it was my parents who told me later that “hump” had a sexual connotation.

A second occurrence of this (which makes the post relevant to the blog) occurred within the last year. For the longest time, I had heard people call TV the “boob tube”. I had always assumed that the phrase referred to the lazy individuals (me) who sit and watch TV. But now, as I examine modern TV, I finally understand the real meaning behind the phrase.

Modern TV is inundated with immodesty. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to realize this. Just watch an average night of television on any of the major stations, and you will find plenty. You don’t even have to watch the shows, just watch their previews or review their plots (Desperate Housewives, Lipstick Jungle, Weeds, etc). Shall I even mention “Dancing With the Stars”?

Every fall and spring, when TV stations start new shows by airing “pilots” – the first episode of an entirely new show that introduces the characters and the basic plot – you can be sure to find junk. The producers will try anything to get viewers, and this usually includes half-naked women. What makes it even more rediculous is that the situations in which these women are present is usually quite forced. Out of curiosity, I watched the first episode of “Knight Rider”, so I could see what all the hype was about ( a talking car? Had semi-potential.) Within the first 5 minutes, when the car became an inferno of flames on the outside, I knew the show was odd.  But when the characters inside the car, in an attempt to survive the two minute drive back to home base where the car could be extinguished, stripped to their underwear so as to keep cool, I knew that this show was going to be bad. And when two scenes past, and the male character walked in on a topless girl, I realized the show was going to be worse than I first thought.

But this isn’t limited to the cheesy shows (as Knight Rider turned out to be). This type of material was present in the first episode of Heroes, the first episode of Fringe, the first BattleStar Gallactica, to name only a few – all incidents in which immodesty was forced.

I’m tired of this. So tired. I love to watch TV, and I’m tired of being forced to shut the TV off because of it. Will producers stop this? I doubt it. It gets them money. Why shouldn’t they stop?

Right?

*sigh*

Foy Lyndström

(Brownie Points to anyone who can ID where the picture is from)

© Foy for Is This Modest?, 2009. | Permalink | 6 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, Foy, immodest, Knight Rider, television, tv

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A simple walk through Wal-mart will easily tell you why. Women’s undergarments are displayed prominently next to every major pathway. Even if that is not enough, large posters are placed near these displays, with models showing just exactly how these clothes look on an extremely thin figure.

Even when one isn’t in the women’s department, semi-clothed women are visible on numerous product labels, from shower related products to swimming pool accessories to even some cold medicines.

Just yesterday I went into a “Dicks Sporting Goods” store, looking for some new “slush shoes”. Since the store sells sports products (say that five times fast), the stereotypical “jogging woman in sports bra or tight, sweaty t-shirt” was present everywhere, making *boot shopping* a temptation infested ordeal.

Borders Bookstore, which I adore visiting (I love books, and I love browsing bookstores) has become one big land mine. Scantily clad women are seen on romantic paperbacks, and other books show even more than that. Browsing the magazine rack for Star Wars Insider (yes, I’m a nerd) is now impossible due to the celebrity gossip genre of magazine, which prominently displays grossly immodest clothing. Even Best Buy, my other favorite store, is now scary to walk through. Movie and CD covers are becoming increasingly immodest.

Why do these stores display such prominent immodesty? The only explanation I can see is a simple one: sex sells. Advertisers realize that if they display a sexually appealing image within their advertisement, people will buy it. Its a sad thing to see and understand, but its true in today’s society. Those of us who are trying to stay pure are falling like pheasants to a hunter within these stores – forever sentenced to walk through them staring at the floor.

I guess this really isn’t an instructional post, just an observational gripe. Am I the only one who feels this way?

Foy Lyndström

© Foy for Is This Modest?, 2009. | Permalink | 23 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, Foy, immodest, Male, store

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Ok. So maybe I’m old fashioned. But I always believed that belts were used to hold up your pants. Right?

No one wants their pants falling down. 

Well, most people don’t want that to happen. Our world has changed – so much so that style is sought after more than functionality. People became more concerned with looking good than actually having quality clothes. This even affected the humble belt. Guy belts soon had big belt buckles; girl belts became “bedazzled”, first with sparkles, and now with shiny studs. And know what? Belts  aren’t even being used on pants anymore. Instead, they’re being placed on shirts and dresses. They become, in effect, useless. But they’re SHINY! And bright. And full of Bling. So they are used. A lot. Even when they are actually used on pants, the pants themselves are quite low, making one wonder: “If you have a belt, why not use it properly, eh?” 

As I look at these belts, and think “Is this Modest?”, I have to say no. The entire concept of modesty revolves around wearing clothes that do not attract attention to one’s “assets” – both north and south. All a shiny belt does is scream: “Look at my waist!” Once an eye goes there, lets just say that things, including the eye, go downhill. By wearing a dull colored belt, one can have functionality and yet keep themselves modest.

Foy Lyndström

© Foy for Is This Modest?, 2008. | Permalink | 11 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, belt, Foy, Male, modesty

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For those of you who truly feel that way, well, tough noogies. I’m here for at least a month.

For those of you don’t know (i.e, all of you) my name is Foy Lyndström, and am currently involved in the quite difficult process of acquiring a BA in DV Cinema. In other words: I’m learning how to be a filmmaker. I met Anna Grace in another part of cyberspace, where she quickly learned that I have the un-enviable skill of being, well, unique… but in a good way! It was just last week that I was conscripted recruited by AG, who hoped that I would add my strange and eccentric wit to this blog in one form or another. While I may not do that to a tremendous extent (after all, I don’t want to scare anyone away), I do hope to add a different perspective to the blog.

I am currently navigating my way through the wonderful world of finals, and will not be able to write that much over the next couple weeks. Once the despicable tests are finished, I hope to use the month following as a trial run, to see if I will be able to successfully adapt to “blog life”. Once my next semester begins in late January, I will take an assessment of how well I am liked, and if everything looks good, both on your side and on mine (school, work, etc.), I will continue to write.

But, what will I write about?

There seems to be a lot of posts and discussion already on the concept of what to place in your closet, and while I do have some thoughts on what to wear, I hope to leave that issue to those who are more familiar with it. After all, I am a guy who is not…well….fashion friendly, so maybe its a good thing that I don’t go there that often. I personally want to plot my course away from the question “What do I wear?”

I hope to explore the concept of modesty (or lack there of) outside of that question, writing about how the world we live in discusses, uses, or doesn’t use modesty. My studies in Film and Media will have an impact in my posts, and since we are bombarded with media of all forms wherever we go, I believe that discussion in that arena of our life is necessary.

I encourage you all to comment on my posts, whether you wish to agree, disagree, or criticize. I very much enjoy positive and negative feedback, for without either, a writer cannot improve, nor can he (or she) be encouraged to continue on.

So please: sit back, relax, and feel free to cower in terror when you see one of my new posts.

Foy Lyndström.

© Foy for Is This Modest?, 2008. | Permalink | 8 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: article, Introduction, media

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