Arielle, I can totally understand that– people are(in general) are so much quicker to offer criticism instead of compliments.  It's important that we encourage those around us.  It's important that we compliment each other, and thank each other for being modest.

Anna09, we're always looking for writers, but it's up to you. I appreciate your comments, and you really add to our community, so if you'd like to write some posts, you're more than welcome, and we'd be glad to have you.

Contact me via the contact form, and we'll set you up.

If this were a guy we're talking about, we'd encourage modesty through logic.  We'd explain why modesty gives power to the modest person, how clothing can cheapen th way you're looked at, etc.  The problem is, I believe tha twomen are influenced through what guys think of her, and the more attention she gets the more she wants.

At least, that's the only way I can rationalize what I see happening.  I'm not saying it's intentional, but it does seem like it's ingrained.  So, we need to actually need to overcome something that's natural.

Now, outside the box, might we calm a lot of this down of people got married earlier?

I was actually trying to combat the modesty issue by changing the source.  I think you're right on that girls dress immodestly for attention– and hopefully marriage would give them attention– but I was actually considering more the men!

See, because we've delayed the age at which people get married, both sexes' sex drive has kicked in, but it's unfulfilled.

That's (what I believe) has lead to increase in teen pregnancy and unwed sex as well as our immodest culture.

When a girl has to compete against other girls for attention, physical and emotion affection, then she has to dress like her peers, or dress is a more provacative way to get the same attention (or at least she thinks that she does).

So, what I'm saying is that if we took the pressure off the boys (they could get married and get their sexual needs met) and off the girls (they wouldn't have to compete for attention because they have their husband), then I think clothing would become more modest.

I think that (if we had the resources) we looked historically we would find that modesty was not as big of a problem in times where the marriage age was a lot younger.

In my mind, it's all related.

Well, America is definitely a weird place when it comes to the whole marriage process.  I mean, historically the idea of teens finding a partner based on feelings was totally foreign.  Parents were much more involved finding people taht were suitable, and I think the foundation of those relationships were stronger.

Think of it this way, a boy and a girl might spend their entire lives getting ready to be the perfect spouse for the other person– instead of wondering who that other person my ght be!

We've been polluted in that we now base relationships and believe that love is all about how I feel toward another person whereas it's really about a unconditional committment to another person.

How much longer would marriages last if we believed that marriage was for life and unconditional than believing that I must love (the feeling) the other person?

Yes, Paul and Peter addressed modesty, so it must always have been a problem to some state, but these comments were always included with the idea that people must concentrate more on the inner "man" than the outer.  Look at Patere's admonition about clothing and you'll see it.

Concerned Secretary said:

I am the secretary at a school for 7th and 8th graders. We have a dress code. .

Our students don't seem to exceed the dress code very oftern in terms of skirt length, however the midriff, cleavage issue is an ongoing battle.

Does anyone have any resource material to share that I could give students and faculty for encouraging modesty?  We also have the ongoing issue of boys with their pants falling down and showing their boxer shorts.  However, my main concern is the cleavage/midriff issue.

I worry about our girls and how much they are willing to show.

Any resource help would be greatly appreciated.

I think that a majority of the problem here is trying to teach the girls about their worth and value.  At that age, they're changing greatly and they want to appeal and attract guys– but they don't understand that they're playing with fire.

Let's see if anyone here has something that can help.