Prom Dress – You Make a Statement

Have you started to think about prom dresses? What styles would you consider?

I remember a few years before my boys were ready to go to prom that as a Christian mom I started looking at prom dresses… and was I ever surprised! I told my friends that I would tell a young lady to go put some clothes on if she dressed so immodest – well, I was only able to tell one or two friends to be honest.

Most parents didn’t think the way I did.

It was like they couldn’t see what I could see. And therefore they let their daughters do what I could never. They approvingly giggle like a high school girl allowing them buy a dress for several hundred dollars that was baring so much skin: low cut necklines, backless, accentuating bust-lines, clinging to womanly curves, cut-out sections to show more flesh, high slits skirts, strapless shoulders, and everything other possible design that shouted, “Look at me! I am sexy.”

But what puzzled me the most on prom nights was not the teen standing in a slinky dress with a low cut front and bare back but her father proudly standing with his arms around his daughter posing for a picture. As the dad felt his daughter’s flesh didn’t it cross his mind that a young man would be holding his daughter and touching her body in places that were intimate? If parents are clueless, how can we expect our teens to have any sense of modesty?

I have seen moms show off their daughter’s prom dresses and squeal with glee when they turn the strapless dress around pointing out that only strings are crisscrossed in the V-shaped back opening. What are they thinking?

More importantly,

What kind of statement are you making in your prom dress?

Look closely at your dress. What does it say? Does it speak to virtues you admire and claim to believe? or Does it tell a different story? Could it cause a date to lust? Is sexual desire what you want your date thinking about all night? I thought you wanted a guy to care about you for who you are on the inside. At least, that is what most Christian teenage girls say in public especially when youth leaders and adults are around.

Often prom dresses should be called “High School Temptation” dresses or “Tease-Your-Date” dresses!

Do you think a girl can only be beautiful if she reveals more of her body? …if she looks alluring? …if she causes males to desire her, to want her? Oh, no, not me. I didn’t think about it that way. I didn’t know. To be honest, I never really gave that much thought.

All too often a girl wants a guy to notice her, to speak to her, to tell her that she is lovely or (to be precise) that she is loved. Most girls will say they don’t really want to be loved for their body. And that they don’t want to be thought of as a sex object! But, what do their choice and actions say?

And sadly, what is true in many teenage girls’ hearts is that they so longs to be wanted that they are willing to do what it takes to get a boyfriend. Only these kind of “boyfriends” are not really the kind they want, but they settle because their desire to be ‘wanted’ or ‘loved’ is so strong. This is a result of hurt. And truly it breaks my heart. Many teens have suffered because of absent fathers, divorce,  sexual abuse, ridicule/bullying and so many other painful past experiences that have told themselves that no one really loves them.

Sweet Daughter of the King, don’t believe this lie!

Let me remind you of a truth: GOD loves YOU! Don’t toss that away as a silly child’s nursery song. Jesus really does love you! He sacrificed his life for you and died for your sins so that you would not be trapped in bad relationships and bad choices. The grace and love of Jesus has the power to set you free from sin and to fill you with love – real lasting love. And He wants you!

So don’t believe the lie that you must dress to attract a guy or to keep him interested in you. Let God bring the young man that will love you properly and godly … and don’t be ashamed to go to a prom with a friend in a modest dress. You might be amazed how much fun you can have without compromising yourself and the values you deep inside want to believe are true.

Lindy Abbott Writer for an Audience of One, wanting to encourage others to know God intimately. She is an adult survivor of child abuse, living victorious wanting to give hope to others who hurt. She home schools her three teens and lives with her husband of 27 years in Tennessee. She writes freelance articles, co-authors other's memoirs for ministry, and is editor for Jonathan's Arrow, a homeschool newsletter. You can read more of her writings at www.lindylou-abbott.blogspot.com and www.abuseandtraume-hope.blogspot.com.